Posts Tagged ‘to’

What is happening and why is it happening again?

This always happens to me, I find some kind of happiness then it is sucked away. I over examine everything that I do in my life and usually over examine what other people say and do. People have done some things to me in my life, but it has never been as serious as I make it to be. Yeah, we could talk about my mother, but that isn’t what I am talking about. I am talking about the fact that people leave me behind and move on. They take me into the woods and leave me like an unwanted dog. I then have to find my way back home, praying that someone will eventually keep me in their home. This is just a thought, though. I am not alone, of course, but sometimes it feels like it. I have a wife, she is the best thing in my life, but sometimes I just want to have someone check in on me. I want a friend to check to make sure that I am fine, but that is wishful thinking, I guess. They stay for a few months, but everyone gets tired of ol’ Blake. They find someone better and will leave.

This is when things get worse for me. This is when anxiety gets into my veins and begin to rot my inner peace. I try to hold on.  It is hard to hold on to a sharp knife. The knife begins to cut your hand and eventually you will let go, this is what anxiety feels like. Anxiety for me has been a horrible battle. I am usually a pretty awesome guy, I want to make everyone happy (well most of the time) until the knife begins to cut, again. When the knife is pressed against my hand, I don’t want anyone to talk to me. I don’t want to go to work. I don’t want to be better, I just want to do what I have always done, slowly sink to the back of the room. It becomes harder to get out of this state, the more that I get into this kind of mood.

Recently, I have found myself in this state. I had to hide behind my crew, because I didn’t want to take any orders, I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I didn’t want to be at work, it was the last thing that I wanted to do. I push people away and make them feel like I hate them when I have this knife pressed against my hand. I tell people to leave and to never come back, but then I want to chase them down, but I have pride so I will sit back and watch them leave. The worst part is that I will blame them because they left. I pushed them into a battlefield, yet I will say that they shot the first bullet. I could understand why these people don’t want to be around me.

I wouldn’t want anyone to hurt me then blame me for them hurting me. I do get that, but I don’t understand why so many don’t want to be around me. I understand that I treat others like shit, but I am talking about those who I don’t even know. They walk out of my life, leaving me to wonder what I did wrong and how I can change myself. These people make me hate my life and then I get more depressed and push more people away.

My anxiety is horrible, I just want to be normal. I want to keep people near me and show others that I am not a creep or something in that nature. I think I am a good swing for those who want to be friends. I just want to know what is wrong with me. Anxiety is horrible. This is where I am right now, full of it. I might be trying to keep ahold of this knife, but I know that I am one nudge away from losing it. .

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Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

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WE did it!
Last night, I posted a new blog. The blog was about Ariel and I hitting a deer, a year ago. This was a scheduled post, because I had to go to work at 5 p.m. which usually means that I write before hand. I like for all my blogs to come out at 8p.m. More people are likely to be on Facebook at that time, so it is the best time to post a blog. Either way, when I saw the notification that my blog went live, I also got another notification. Fun fact: I posted the same blog twice during the scheduling, so I thought it telling me that blog also went live. But when I went to check the notification it told me that I have officially reached 500 post on Impromtdude. 500th!!!!! POST! That is amazing, guys!

We all have heard my sappy story about why Impromtdude even exist, and how I actually wanted to end this weeks after the launch, but I didn’t because I was nervous. I figured if I deleted this blog, I would never become a writer. This is when I decided to keep it. Since then, I have grinded to make sure I posted daily. I lost my way a few times, but I never gave up. I took a vacation, but I returned. I lost my ideas, but I kept pushing through. Every rocky road led me back to this amazing blog. That is when I decided to stop trying to quit and embrace my love for writing. That is when I bought the domain Impromtdude.com. I knew if I put money into this blog then I wouldn’t want to give up.

Shortly after the purchase, I went on to get apparel going. I shopped the market and found a pretty cheap producer, but you get what you pay for. I went to a more expensive place, but their material didn’t match the price. This year, I plan on making a big impact to this by making apparel a thing for Impromtdude.

Today,  I want to reflect on the last 500 post by answering some of my own questions. Lets take a trip down memory lane; will you join me?

What is my favorite post?

I love the post titled “First love Vs. True love.” This was a post about deciding to help a first love. I had a dream that my first love was in trouble, which made me ask “Could I put my previous feelings aside without hurting my current relationship?” I came to the conclusion that I could because the strength of my love to Ariel outdoes the love I had for Ems.

What post do I remember doing the best?

The post that did the best was my write up on 878, a local rap group. This post gave my blog a huge spark that I ended up keeping for a long time. The fire did simmer down, but I kept a huge following from this post.

What post did I love working on the most?

This is a hard question, because I love all of my work. If I had to grind down to one specific post my favorite would be “Small blogger vs. The world.” This was an inspirational post meant for those who thought they couldn’t beat the odds. The world is full of writers that want to make it, which can make it hard for small beginning bloggers. This usually makes them quit because they think it’s a waste of time to even try. This blog went on to help a lot of people, which was super fun in my opinion.

What can we expect for the next 500 post?

I am excited about the next 500 post. I want to get to 1,000 by the end of the year. I know that is impossible, but I really want it to happen. You should expect more passion coming out of these post. I didn’t know what I was doing 500 post ago, but I have learned so much in this field. I have learned more about grammar, promotion/advertising, humor, people and much more. All this together, we are going to have a great time! Also, expect apparel and more business related items.

I am excited about the next few months. After hitting 500 post, I think I finally found my full happiness. This is important if you want to survive. With this being said, it is time to get serious. I want the next 500 post to be my very best. But for now; I want to say THANK YOU. You guys have been by my side this whole time. You saw some of my most heartfelt post and you have seen my most ridiculous post. Through the changes, you guys have always been there. This brings a lot of happiness to my heart. For that I want to say Thank you. Please keep supporting me. We will make it soon! 2017 is already great with you guys!!!

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Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

And it starts now!
I wanted to start this year off great, but that didn’t go as planned. I think I slept all day, yesterday. Yes. This is true; I did sleep all day yesterday. I went to work and came home to sleep until 5 a.m. today. I needed the sleep, but I forgot to write before I went to bed. This means that I forgot to post on New Years Day. This is great since I made a New Years Resolution to write more. Before you start to throw tomatoes, understand the situation.

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I am tired of not being able to say “I have had good times!” This is why I went all out on New Years Eve. We decided to have a party at our house and lets say; WE GOT TURNT UP! We had one of the best nights, ever. The party didn’t get too out of control, but every single person had a great time, including myself.

We started out by eating pizza. We went cheap and got frozen pizza. But the frozen pizza was even good. I think we had the pizza for only ten minutes. After the pizza, we all got the table set up for some fun. The fun was to start with a few games of Beer Pong. We bought the crappy, cheap beer so that people would suffer from the taste. I was on fire during the first few matches, but my team lost all the matches. This was a great start for what was about to happen.

Now, know that I am not a drinker. I have been drunk once before and it didn’t turn out good. This time it was different. We all gathered around the table and took shots of all different alcohols, while making silly jokes about everything in life. We got hungry in the middle of the alcohol so we started to eat pizza rolls. We also stopped so we could watch the ball drop and play some COD. But once the ball dropped, we were all back in the kitchen, tipping back some harder drinks than before.

It was 3am in no time. This is when the really funny stuff began to happen. I wont name any names, but Ross got a pitcher of Gatorade thrown on him, Frank threw up first then cried, I fell off a chair and hit my head, Harold was making gay passes towards me, and Henry fell through a door. All this lead up to Frank breaking our couch. He was sloppy drunk and tried to lie down on the couch. Well, he is overweight and landed directly on the arm of the couch. Luckily, this isn’t a couch that we care about and have wanted to throw away for a few years, so it was funny to see him fall. At this point, we were tipsy at least, so anything was funny, honestly. I don’t remember every detail, but I know that the party stopped at 3:15 a.m. and I had to be at work at 5 a.m.

I wasn’t drunk, but even working tipsy was going to be a challenge. Luckily, I was only there to help our GM with counts, but even that was a challenge. My GM was okay with me coming in with alcohol in my system, and she knew that I had been drink; she made the comment “Damn, I can smell the booze on you!” This was followed by a long laughter and a offer of some nausea medicine. I declined the medicine, of course, but we made jokes the whole time about what happened the night before.

I only worked until 12, but those were the longest hours, eveeeeeerrrrrr. I had to wait for my ride (because I don’t drink and drive!) which showed up at 12:30. When I got home, I was shocked on how fast I fell asleep. I slept all the way through the night, with only waking up to eat pizza. I finally woke up at 5 a.m.

Now, after the night of adventure, I am starting this 365 days in a row posting challenge. I know I can do it, but know it might be hard! Either way, I want to say one thing. If you are young, do what young people do. This doesn’t mean you have to drink. Do what you think will make you feel like your age. Life is too damn short to feel like you’re in prison! Live like your last day is tomorrow, or you will wake up in 40-years, wishing you could go back and live. Don’t be that girl/boy. Live now!  

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

Christmas is over.

Thank goodness for Christmas being over. This season has brought nothing but stress and fights, but it is over guys! Now, we get to look forward to a new year! 2016 was a pretty crappy year, but I have a feeling that 2017 will be a whole lot better! Even with the year not being the best, I have to look back on some great things that did happen, then I will write a short goal for 2017. I do plan on doing a New Years resolution post, but that will be on Sunday!!!

In 2016, We started out strong here on Impromtdude. In March, we were able to buy our first domain. That is right, we went from Impromtmaster.wordpress.com to Impromtdude.com. It was a small but amazing step to take. This was followed by getting my first hoodie and T-shirt. We also were able to raise our stats, by having one of post do super amazing, followed by a few others. Though we did amazing, we did fall short in a few other places.

We were giving a reward for continuously posting, but then one day lost all of that for us. I was too late one night, which ended that streak. This was the first time in almost a year that I didn’t post. Since then, I have failed to post daily. Its just hard to live life and do great things, stuff that I will write about, and post a blog every night. On top of all of this, I was starting to feel like this was more of a chore than a passion. This is when I realized that I was posting for stats, not for readers enjoyment. This is when I took a little time off. I have been off and on since then. But that is no problem, we will get back. Sometimes you just need a break. On other news, we are going to fall short of 100 likes on Facebook, which is pretty upsetting. This is something that I am going to change soon, but for now we will watch as I have failed to reach that number…

Now, we will talk about 2017.

Nothing could be as bad as 2016. You might have had a good year, but no one else did. 2016 was the year that took a huge amount of celebrities, two of my cars, my sanity and much more. That is why I am excited to get this next year started. With the new year, there will be a new goal for Impromtdude. This is something that I want to get back to and will attempt to do so in the next 365 days.

In 2017, I would love to build off of what we started. We were able to get apparel last year, I want to build on that. This will include a huge amount of items such as; Hoodies, T-shirts, hats, caps, sweat pants and/or socks. Now, not all the items will be available, but I hope to have something more for my dedicated fans. To build my fan base I will be making business cards/magnets. This will help my blog grow by giving me an easy way to promote myself when in public. But there is more! In 2017, I will be stepping out more and connecting with other writers. I plan on helping some people with their writing, writing with other people, having people guess blog, and many other amazing things. You will be seeing a lot of new faces. This is the best way to stay fresh; keep your blog enticing, by adding new opinions and faces. 

There will be more to come, but for now this is it. I will go into more detail Sunday, but know that 2017 will be the year that will make or break this blog. I really hope you will take this ride with me, because I can’t do this without you guys.

Also, I got a new laptop, so that is exciting!!! And I am getting glasses once this year ends. I can’t see crap, anymore. I finally know it’s time to get glasses.

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Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

Santa is real
    You see the big man every year at the mall. He is always smiling and fixing his beard. He is ready for the photo. Say cheese! Snap! Next please!. He asks your child what he wants for Christmas, and tells you parents that don’t know what your kid likes. So gentle to those babies, that’s how Santa. Yet when kids get to a certain age we, as parents, have to tell them a lie. The lie that is so famous around this time of the year is that “Santa Claus is fake.” You parents want the full credit on the gifts that are stuffed under the tree. Why would you still the joy from the big mans heart.

    He has been taking out of Christmas, like Jesus was removed from Schools. But no one bats an eye. We act as if it is okay that we banned him. He has to pay the rental on his sleigh, just like we do for our cars. What if you lost your job? Feel bad yet? No? Fine. You know he also has a wife and reindeers? (this isn’t including Rudolph, he is on drugs) He has to feed those Elves also! So do me a favor and stop lying to the future of this generation. You are sick!

p.s. Stop eating Santas’ cookies!

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Dear Children,
Please take the advice above. Your parents are liars, I am actually real. I use to bring amazing gifts. But over the years the treats have disappeared and I cant feed myself anymore. Back in the day, I was able to feed the reindeer and myself, now I come back to Mrs. Claus with an empty stomach! It became such an issue that I had to leave my Santa days behind for a while, only because I was getting too skinny! But now, I am back to my fluffy self! Mrs. Claus is so amazing that she made sure to get me back to full fatness. Now that I am back please do me a favor. Stop EATING MY DAMN COOKIES@!!!!!!!
-Santa, bitches!

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

Posted: November 18, 2016 in Uncategorized
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Another week without football, it just hasn’t been a possibility for me. This week I had some home issues that needed fixed then we watched AMCs’ The Walking Dead. All of this kept me from another Sunday. I have fully giving up on Fantasy and now I am just mainly waiting for something amazing to happen. But we shall keep this going by talking about close and blowout games. Browns got their ass stomped, again. I truly thought they could get their first win, but now I am sure that they will go 0-16. With the rest of their schedule are of teams that will kill them, the worse team being the Bengals. This doesn’t give any Browns fan hope, since we know they wont do anything with that first round pick, but we shall see. Other than the obvious, the Broncos won a close game, the Jets still suck, the Packers defense and offense still are struggling, the Vikings are officially on their decline, Bears WR Jeffery is a druggy, Seahawks show that Brady has a kryptonite, and the Cowboys are number 1 in the NFL under a rookie Qb and RB. What a great season so far, lets see how we did…….74-46-2 meaning we went 7-6 this week. I’m a true winner XD

Saints @ Panthers
Winner: Panthers

Cards @ Vikings
Winner: Cardinals

Bills @ Bengals
Winner: Bills

Bears @ Giants
Winner: Giants

Steelers @ Browns
Winner: Steelers, Though I would love to see the Browns win…

Bucs @ Chiefs 
Winner: Chiefs

Ravens @ Cowboys
Winner: Cowboys

Jags @ Lions
Winner: Lions

Titans @ Colts
Winner: Titans

Dolphins @ Rams
Winner: Rams

Pats @ 4th-and-9ers
Winner: Patriots

Eagles @ Seahawks
Winner: Eagles

Packers @ Redskins
Winner: Redskins

Texans @ Raiders
Winner: Raiders.

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Bonus:
Conference Finals predictions:
Raiders Vs. Patriots
Seahawks Vs. Cowboys
Stay tuned for Superbowl predictions, next week!

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

Another week without football, it just hasn’t been a possibility for me. This week I had some home issues that needed fixed then we watched AMCs’ The Walking Dead. All of this kept me from another Sunday. I have fully giving up on Fantasy and now I am just mainly waiting for something amazing to happen. But we shall keep this going by talking about close and blowout games. Browns got their ass stomped, again. I truly thought they could get their first win, but now I am sure that they will go 0-16. With the rest of their schedule are of teams that will kill them, the worse team being the Bengals. This doesn’t give any Browns fan hope, since we know they wont do anything with that first round pick, but we shall see. Other than the obvious, the Broncos won a close game, the Jets still suck, the Packers defense and offense still are struggling, the Vikings are officially on their decline, Bears WR Jeffery is a druggy, Seahawks show that Brady has a kryptonite, and the Cowboys are number 1 in the NFL under a rookie Qb and RB. What a great season so far, lets see how we did…….74-46-2 meaning we went 7-6 this week. I’m a true winner XD

Saints @ Panthers
Winner: Panthers

Cards @ Vikings
Winner: Cardinals

Bills @ Bengals
Winner: Bills

Bears @ Giants
Winner: Giants

Steelers @ Browns
Winner: Steelers, Though I would love to see the Browns win…

Bucs @ Chiefs 
Winner: Chiefs

Ravens @ Cowboys
Winner: Cowboys

Jags @ Lions
Winner: Lions

Titans @ Colts
Winner: Titans

Dolphins @ Rams
Winner: Rams

Pats @ 4th-and-9ers
Winner: Patriots

Eagles @ Seahawks
Winner: Eagles

Packers @ Redskins
Winner: Redskins

Texans @ Raiders
Winner: Raiders.

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Bonus:
Conference Finals predictions:
Raiders Vs. Patriots
Seahawks Vs. Cowboys
Stay tuned for Superbowl predictions, next week!

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

I have stood by and watched two people attack each other for about a year. They are trying to win everyone’s vote, no matter the cost. I am not political, so I usually stay out of any political conversations. I find that talking about politics only brings the hate out in people. It’s the fact that everyone has their own opinion (wrong or right) about each candidate. Some just want their designated party in the office, where others don’t like certain things about one, but want to do what’s best for the country. Whatever the situation, everyone is set on their candidate and nothing will change their mind. That is why I don’t talk about politics, because nothing I will say can change someone’s mind, so why try? All you will do is make more people mad at what you say, so I keep quite. 

   Now that the election is over, I will share a few thoughts and will end with greeting the new leader in. 

    I don’t like either candidate. I didn’t even like Sanders. Trump is to inexperienced for the job. He doesn’t have any political background which scares me. I wouldn’t want a cart pusher to rewire my home, so why would I? That is how fires start. He doesn’t know the first thing about running a country. I don’t know the job, but I am sure it’s harder than just saying you are going to change things. In my opinion, we could be going into a war due to his inexperienced approach to everything. He is a hateful person, a horrible trait for president. Even with all his flaws, he does stand for a tighter border, something I sorta agree with. No, I don’t want to build a wall, nor do I want to force people out of the country. Instead, I would want to tighten our borders, making it hard (like Canada) to get in. This would allow us to conduct more background checks, though this could be too expensive, leading to a downfall of the system. 

   Next, Hillary. Another Clinton. I think I could hate her less if she didn’t lie. She lied saying that she didn’t send any emails, then she got caught and changed her story. When she got caught, she went from “I didn’t send any emails” to a woman that was sorry for sending the e-mails. Why couldn’t she just own up to the e-mails and take the punishment? I would have respect her more, if she would just been clean in the beginning. We don’t know what those emails said, nor do we know if that could lead us into a huge war, we will never know. though she was dumb for the emails, Hillary seems to be more intelligent than Trump, but I also see that she is someone that just wants to win, so she will say anything for a vote. This leads me to think that she will give that same attitude after elected. I don’t like a lot of her stands, but one pisses me off more than anything, this being her stand on abortion. I understand that she wants to give women more rights and that’s awesome, but late term abortions are not okay in my eyes. I think a baby shouldn’t be killed the moment it grows any form of life, meaning any form of brain activity or a heart beat. If it’s okay to kill a baby with a heartbeat or brain activity, then why is it considered double homicide to kill a pregnant woman? Either way, Hillary seems to know what she is doing, even if she is a possible liar. 

Real quick. Bernie had great ideas, but free school wouldn’t have worked. We would have to find some way to pay for it, Which would probably be a result in higher taxes. But we will never know, now.

   Tonight will be an intense battle. Both candidates are ready to be president, bit only one can win. If Hillary wins, we will have the first woman president. If Trump wins, we will have the first president to have had a TV show (I didn’t know what to say.) Either way, we will have a new leader by the end of the night. Let us pray that they know what to do to keep America great or Make America Great Again. 
Congrats, 

Donald Trump
We pray you know what to do to keep us great. We might not have voted for you, but we will respect your leadership. We welcome you. 

Disclaimer: I didn’t vote. 

It is happening
   I have made a lot of pages in the past, most of them being pages for my blog. This time I will be making a Facebook page for something a lot cooler! I think, other than my Impromtdude page, this will be my most favorite page. This page will be dedicated to my new found hobby.

I’m going to make a new page for my special effects hobby, called Impromtdude Effects. I am still deciding if I want this name to stick, but it will work for now. For now, I will take the time to make material for the new page, while also trying to grow it as fast as possible. It is going to be fun to make the material and find ways to get the page out there. This is something I need to care more about with Impromtdude, but they both will be connected.

This page is for an art called “Special effects” and it will feature my work. This work has covered Burns, cuts, slit wrist, ripped fingers and bruises. This wont be the only thing it touches on, though. This page will also touch on how to get better if you are wanting to be an effects artist, yourself, by teaching a few techniques that I use and so on and how to make certain materials so you don’t have to spend a fortune on something you don’t know you truly want to do. Now, I do know I am new, but I know enough to teach others.

      My biggest goal is to do effects for haunted houses as I progress towards bigger jobs. I have done a few effects so far and they will be featured on this new page, so will you go check it out? Join this journey with me as I attempt to do something I honestly love. I will still be a full time blogger, but I will also be doing effects. It is pretty easy to keep both going, so that is what I will be doing. Click below to help me out!

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Faebook.com/ImpromtEffects

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

Top 10 things I want to do before I die!
Bucket list are very important to make. Bucket list consist of things that you want to do before a certain time, usually they are things that you have wanted to do since you were a child (example: I have always wanted to go to Alaska) My biggest goal is to go to Alaska, this is something that I have told myself needs to happen by a certain time, this is what a bucket list is; it is a list of hopes and wants that you set out to accomplish/experience. I made one a few years ago, but now I want to go back and think of ten things that I want to do, by the time I die.

10. Get paid to write- This isn’t majorly important, but I would like to say that my writing was good enough to make a dollar off of, even if it was only a dollar. I have a partial plan to get this done, but I am still confused on getting it all together.

9. Particiapate in a 5k/marathon- Running is a big hobby (or use to be) of mine. My dream is to be in a 5k or a marathon one day. I know it is easy to get into a 5k, but I want to be in good enough shape to finish in the top ten.

8. Go back to school- There is a 22% chance (guess) of me making it as a writer. That can only be affected by a degree, I have to get a degree to have a better chance. This is why I want to go back to school.

7. Travel to the most beautiful places and write there- Traveling the world would be amazing, but to write everywhere would be even better! Who would turn that down? I know I wouldn’t! All I need is my laptop, wife, my doggy, and a very long road ahead
of us, and my life would be complete!

6. Have a kid(s)- I am scared to have a kid, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want one. People think I hate kids, but that is just me playing cool. I love kids and eventually want a few of my own. I am just scared of failing…lol

5. Write/film a movie- Yes, I want to be a part of a movie! Writing/producing a movie has always been a dream of mine. This is probably a far fetched dream, but just maybe!

4. Do something with special effects/get better- I talked about this earlier this week and it has been on my mind more lately. I could do something with special effects, even if it’s a local haunted house, either way I could do something with it, so that is what I will do.

3. Writing my first novel- I have it planned and I have the resources, but I just cant get it done. I don’t know what to do, but I recently bought something to help me, so maybe I could finally get this off my bucket list!

2. Go to Alaska- Ariel and I would have the best time in Alaska. We would be able to sleep under the northern lights, maybe share a kiss under those same lights, also enjoy the many things that Alaska has to offer. 

1.  Open a homeless shelter- One day, I will open a homeless shelter. Being someone that was once homeless, I know how it feels to not have a place to sleep. Let me tell you, it sucks! I don’t want anyone feeling like I felt, this is why I want to do this. It is a small gesture, but I  know it would mean the world to someone! 

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Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude