Posts Tagged ‘dreams’

 

man sitting on edge facing sunset

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When I was in 6th grade, I wrote my first real story. It was a horror story and I was so proud of it, though I can’t remember what it was about. But I was proud! I proud enough to walk over to my teacher and told her that I was going to be a writer, one day. She read it and raised one of her eyebrows. She told me that it was a good start and that I was very creative. This was the beginning of something special. She told me that it was full of run-ons, but that it could be turned into a master piece; and that no matter what I do, to chase my dreams. This is what started this crazy journey. I knew at that moment, that I wanted to be a writer, and I would do anything (in my power) to become one.

I never had anyone put me down for my writing. I remember when I was in 4th grade, we were supposed to write a story, but I couldn’t because my mother didn’t have a stable home for me to write in. I didn’t do the assignment, but the teacher wanted me to read it to the class. She wanted me to read it in front of a class, a story I never wrote! So what was I supposed to do, tell her I didn’t do the assignment? Heck no! I got up, walked to the front of the class and read my story about a vicious bear, tearing through a town of innocent families. I read for 10 minutes, flipping through the pages, until I finished. After the reading, she asked for the pages, I nervously handed them over and went back to my seat. She went on with the class, asking the next student to come forward and share. The bell rang 30 minutes later; I got up and walked to the door to go to lunch. But as I got to the front of the room, my teacher called my name. My chest was burning as I turned around. “Yes, mam?” She was holding my story up, revealing the empty pages. I began to shake, knowing that I failed the assignment. She told me that I should have been honest, but that I had a huge imagination, one that could make a good career one day. She gave me an A on the assignment for the creativity, since she couldn’t tell that I was reading an empty page.

Jump ahead to my senior year of high school. I have multiple WIPs; I have a solid blog and I’m getting more confident with my talents. A guy comments on my blog, telling me that I need to keep writing. I didn’t know that people could read my blog. I didn’t share it anywhere, so it through me off when I got such love. It felt great!  I also had a teacher behind me, pushing me to use my gifts, knowing I could be something.

Now I am a writer. I write daily. I have my days where I don’t want to write, or weeks where I feel I’m not a good enough writer, but I just remember the encouragement, from my past, and I get back to work, creating more content for you guys, knowing that the people in my past would be happy with where I am now! I never stopped following my dream to become a writer, so why would you give up on your dreams?

Stop telling yourself that you aren’t good enough. Stop grabbing your dream then letting it go because you think you don’t have enough grip on it. One day you will wake up and it will be too late to grab it, so grab it now! Don’t be worried about the outcome, but instead, make the outcome! Don’t stop chasing your dream because your legs are tired. Push through the hard times and grab that dang want. You want the dream to come true, don’t you? It’s all within your chest! You are the creator, so create the ending that you want. If you want to be a doctor, then become a doctor. You are the only one that is standing in your way. You can do this. I know you can.

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The flipping glow of success.

What is Success?

Success is the favorable result in a situation. Success is something that many want and will spend their whole life trying to achieve. Though many will try to be successful, many will find it very challenging. It might be hard to find success in the path that they take, but it isn’t impossible. Hard work comes before success, this is where many will fail. These people don’t want to work hard to get what they want, so this leads them to quit on what they are attempting to finish, leading to a big failure. If they would have worked harder or even taking a different path, they might have succeeded. Either way, they should have kept working hard, because great things happen to those who work hard.

This brings me to the point of this post. Over a year ago, I posted about making a giant splash in the writing world. I thought that it was going to be easy, but I found that it wasn’t even close to that. Finding the right crowd, the correct formulas and even finding the passion to write can be very hard at times. I know this from my failed attempt to make it big on Facebook. My page has yet to hit 100 likes, where as my friends writing pages have gathered over 1,000 in the last year. This is an upsetting fact, to know that what I thought was going to be the easiest part is now the hardest. It doesn’t seem hard to grow a page, I mean all you have to do is share, right? That is wrong! I find that to be the most annoying ways to grow. I don’t want to get big off of spamming people for their likes, but how am I suppose to get this page going? That is what is hard, because you need a formula.

I don’t have that formula, I don’t know how to get that formula. I wish someone would come along with a free trial, just so I can take what the formula taste like. There is a science behind getting people to want what you have. In order to find that out, you mainly have to be a peoples person, that is something I am not. I love people, but I don’t understand people. That is what screws me. How can I get someone I don’t understand to like something that I made?
In addition to all of this, once you begin to find the formula, you can be hit with writers block. This is what happened to me. Somewhere in the last year I found the formula, I was growing like nothing else, then it all halted. I forgot what to do, I lost the passion, and I began to spew out a bunch of half-hearted crap. These were post that I didn’t even like myself,  but for some reason I posted them. By the time I got my passion back, the crowd was gone. I miss my shot and now I can’t seem to find the formula again.

So I missed my chance to grow big, should I give up though? No! I find that trying to find the right formula is the greatest part of trying to get big. What appreciation would I have if everything was giving to me? If I was giving the chance to be famous (not something I want) I would turn it down. Being giving something like that would lead to me hating the position I’m in. This is because you love what you work hard for. I love our car because we had crap cars before, but also because we have to pay for it. Likewise, I love being a writer because I have to work hard to get better. When you put work into something, you want something to come out of it. You don’t want to waste time, so you will make sure that you do anything to allow your investment to grow. So just because I lost my chance, this doesn’t mean that I will give up. This is just another reason to bust my ass to get back to where I was. I must put in the work to gain the reward.

I am wanting to succeed as a writer. It is my goal to be known, so if I have to fail a thousand times to do so, you better know that I am going to do so. I don’t care if it takes forever to do so, just know that I will look failure in the face and laugh! Because I know I have something special. Failure has no place for me!!!

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Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

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    I will be a gamer! I will quit my writing career, to play a video game every second of everyday! I will leave my wife alone in the room, and come out in the living room and play video games, all night. I will tell my boss that I am not coming to work, so all the focus is on my future dream. I will do it…. I can do…my tears are falling…..this is my chance to become a man….where is my Xbox controller?
Oh my god, it feels so right. I plop in a game, Black ops, and find a lobby. There are a lot of noobs in this dang lobby, ha-ha losers. This will be my first clip that will start my career off right. I round the corner, but there is no one there. I round another corner and still no one there. I lay down on the ground, patiently waiting for someone to come around the corner to pop their head off, yet no one comes around. So I place a claymore on the ground and run away.
The game is quiet, not a single shot has left a barrel. It is thirty seconds into this game, and no one has a kill. I am still furiously searching for my first victim. The game must have kicked everyone off the server, or maybe its all campers in the lobby? I wont give up, though! This is my life now, this is the reason I quit everything, to follow in the footsteps of my GOD! I will make him happy.
    Then out of no where a man jumps out, and plasters my head. I fall to the ground, dead. But I respawn seconds later. I grip my controller tightly, and begin to run across the map to find the one who killed me. I get to the spot that he killed me, and all-of-a-sudden I fall to the ground again, after tripping a claymore. I moaned in anger, but kept the faith. All gamers have those gun fights that they lose, I will recapitalize, and get back into this game. But as I spawned in, a man with a sniper, shot me as he did a 360` no-scope.
    I fell to the ground, again. This time I screamed and slammed my controller to the desk. But then something whispered into my ear. A man from heaven came to me, telling me this is my destiny. This is what I am living for, no one can stop me. I picked up my controller, and began to crawl around my spawn-area. But soon enough, a grenade flopped right in front of me. I tried to get out of the way, but it detonated, blowing a canister of gas up, leaving me for the reaper.
I raged, but that wasn’t going to stop me. There were only a few seconds left in the match, which is all I needed. I have been fighting for this, I am an overcomer! I put my gamer glasses on, and fire myself up as I walked around a brick wall. I got hit markered, but it didn’t kill me. I knew the guys location, it was time to exterminate. I aimed down my sights and rounded the corner. I saw him in the left house window. I quickly aimed, and shot. One hit marker, two hit markers………..end of the match…..I lost. I was about to get the kill, yet I lost.
I went back to the previous game screen, went into the settings, but realized something. There is nothing lower than Recruit on the bots…..I then called my boss back, I begged for my job, he said okay. I then wrote this blog, and now I have to face the deadliest beast in this whole world, my wife……She has been screaming since 1 a.m., I look down, it is 5 a.m.…………I’m dead.

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

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I have always been fascinated with dreams. I think it is amazing how the mind can work. I like the fact that even if I have never been somewhere, my brain can print out some blueprints, and use my creativity to light the way. There have been some amazing journeys taking inside my mind after I close my eyes, that have left me amazed, but there are also some that have left me terrified, but what do they mean?

I see certain things in my dreams, and those items are what I remember of all the dreams. One time all I could distinctly remember was a cat. I am not a fan of cats, nor do I want one, so why would I dream of it? The fact that a little hair ball caught my attention got me curious, on to what it actually meant. Why do we remember some part of the dream, yet forget the rest? Is it a secret desire that we have been ignoring, or maybe it’s a warning, one that we need to listen to? But how can we be sure?

This is where I was stumped, I wanted to know why I was dreaming certain things, but had no knowledge of the topic. This is where Barnes and Noble actually was needed. I knew they had a section for dreaming, and spiritual books, but I was unsure if they covered this topic, and even if they did, what was I truly looking for? How could I ask about it…what was I suppose to do. Luckily when I got there, I found the answer right off the bat.

As I went to my favorite section (Bargains) I saw a book that seemed to answer all of my questions. This book was a light brown color dictionary, that read ‘Dream Language.’ I quickly grabbed the book, not looking at the price, and went on with my shopping. In the next isle, there was a book called ‘Nightmare dictionary’ this was a book like the one I picked up, but dealt with more scary dreams, and deadlier signs. I figured this was going to be needed to, since I wanted to know about dreams, and why we dream certain things. I ended up buying both books, only adding up to $20, all thanks to bargains!

I went home that night and began to read some of the definitions, starting with cat. This is what is said about cats; “someone has led you to believe that you may become more familiar with them but they don’t want you to behave in an overly friendly fashion in public. You will be made to look bad and this person will ignore you in front of others! Then it gives you a approximate time in which it will happen.

This book might not be super-accurate, but it explains so many hidden details of some dreams that we have. It puts us one step closer to understanding what is going on around us, and if we can brace ourselves for a heartbreak, or worse, then isn’t this book worth keeping?

Since I bought this book, I haven’t been able to dream. But I still want to use the book, so I am here to offer a service. Anytime that something sticks out in a dream, would you like to bring it to me, and I can search it for you. This can also be used for nightmares, and since the books are huge, I am sure you can bring everything. I have always been curious of the dream state, and have been wanting to study it. This is a great place to start. 

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

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I am scared to go downstairs, into my dark-and-cold basement. The walls are falling apart, there is plaster on the ground, where the wall use to stand tall and strong. Each wall has some type of hole in it. There are three bedrooms, but each one has its own freakiness. I hate going down into my basement, but that’s where my laundry is!

I started laundry almost an hour ago, but as I walked up stairs, and began to write again, I heard a loud screech. I figured it was the washer being old, but then the upstairs door opened, no one was there. I blew it off as the wind, and sat back down, but then again, it came open. I scorned the wind, shouting the door again, this time I put the chain on the door. That kept the door from coming open for about ten minutes. But just now, the door came open again, but it was caught by the chain.

I went to inspect it, but nothing was open this time. I figured I was hearing noises, I don’t spend much time home alone, but when I do, things like this don’t happen. What should I do? I asked myself. I wanted to leave, yet I didn’t have the car. My wife wanted to take herself to work today, so I was stuck here for now; this was fake anyways.

I couldn’t be in a haunted house, yeah the basement is scary, but not haunted. That is absurd, we wouldn’t have something watching over us at night, none of us played with demons as children, or went to a real haunted house, where they could have attached to us. I had to much sugar today, that is why my brain is playing these games. This is why doctors advise you to not drink Surge in bulk. But I ignore those articles, my body will tell me when to stop, but is this my body telling me to stop? I don’t think so, as I take a sip of the Surge.

I just heard something again, this time everyone is home. It is 3 a.m. and everyone is asleep. The noise didn’t wake anyone but me, but it was loud, I don’t understand. I truly am scared, but what can I do? Should I wake up my wife, she has to work at 5 a.m., I wouldn’t want to be awoken for nothing. I am by myself in this mess, with nothing to defend myself with if there is anything, I am screwed. I got out of my bed, and walked to my bedroom door, this is when I heard my mother-in-law yell. I opened my door, which is connected to the living room, where the front door is.

The door knob was jiggling, I saw the lock begin to turn. I quickly ran to the door, and pushed the door shut. Whoever was trying to push open the door, was strong, nearly fighting me to death. I grabbed the chain to the door, and wrapped it around the doorknob, the person stopped fighting, and left. I went back into my room, to grab my phone, in order to call 911. I opened the door, turned on the light, and realized that my wife wasn’t home. I was confused, due to the fact that she was just in bed.

The state of my emergency, forced me to stop thinking about her, and worry about getting someone here.
I got connected to the dispatcher when the basement door shot open, stopping inches from the door frame, with the chain. I ran into the kitchen, and slammed the door, locking the deadbolt. The lock began to turn again, and finally unlocked, I wasn’t worried, since the chain would stop the door. The door jammed open, pulling tension on the chain, followed by an old lady saying she had a gun. I knew we needed to get out of the house, but how many were there? I soon fought that idea, and went to grab my pocket knife, off my desk.

As I ran past the door, a bullet emptied into the door. I fell to the ground, as the chain busted from pressure. I flipped myself and looked at the woman holding a gun. She was dead, her eyes were crawling with maggots, her mouth was full of dried blood, and she walked with a half eating foot. She got up to my body, lifted the gun, and pulled the trigger.

I woke up in a puddle of sweat that night, instantly checking all of my doors. I felt invaded without having an invasion. The dream felt all so real to me, every little bit of it. I couldn’t catch my breathe as my wife turned over and grabbed me. She asked me if I was okay, I told her we would talk about it the next morning. Until this day, I fear hearing noises in this house, knowing that one day, that same lady could make her way to our house. 

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

Could you move across the world to achieve your dream?

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I have been thinking back to my college days a lot lately, which is when I decided to come back home to move in a different direction. I was studying pastoral studies in Kansas City, and I couldn’t have been happier, well for the first few months. It didn’t last though, I felt that I was wasting much needed time doing something, I no longer wanted to do. I ran out of the ministry juice, and no longer wanted to study religion. This was after a dream, that woke me up in the middle of the night, and kept me up the whole night. The dream was more a path that I knew I wanted to take, but my fear of failure was outweighing my courage of succeeding.

I wanted to come back home to study locally. This was forced also by not finding a solid job, that wouldn’t keep me from college for a semester. In the dream, I saw myself finishing my first novel, and becoming a world-known writer. I was excited instantly about becoming a professional writer, that the dean-of-students offer wasn’t enough to keep me around. Even though they gave me a semester free, and helped with my rent, I no longer wanted to be there. I left during a Sunday service, and packed up my things. I came back home to Illinois, without telling anyone there. I know it was wrong to do so, with everything they did for me but it was now-or-never, or so I thought.

When I got back to Illinois, I got lazy. I didn’t try to get a job, I didn’t care about the same things as before. I didn’t want to write anymore. I felt like I was wasting my time doing nothing, so I planned to attend another seminary, in order to show those around me, that I didn’t come back to lay around. I never got into the seminary, due to the money issues I was experiencing. But this would change shortly, when I met my wife.

My wife wanted me to follow my true dream, which was to become a writer. She pushed me to go back to college, and get my degree in journalism. But when I showed interest, my job began to want me to pull more hours. With the more hours that I was getting, the less the chance became, that I was able to go to college. This is when I decided that I was going to try becoming published without a degree. This is nearly an impossible task, but where there is a will there is a way. Now that I have started my portfolio, I know the things that need to be done in order to get my name out there. This could lead me to a new location on the map, yes I am talking about moving.

I have started to promote through some amazing items, which I blogged slightly about, last night. But the reality is, sometimes you need to move to become someone in this industry. Springfield might not be the best place for me to try and grow, but at the same time it might be the best place. The question is though; Could I move if it came to it?

The answer is “Yes.” As a writer, I see that my future could cause me to go to another city, state, or country. This is any job, you have to be ready to relocate, and I am. It would be hard, but how could I say that I want to grow but not take the steps that it takes to do so? I can’t, that’s why it is important to ready your heart to do the hardest things in life, no matter the cost.

If you hold back, because of fear, you could miss an opportunity of a lifetime, I will not though.
I have been taking the steps that I need to, and I have seen that it has helped. But time will tell if the steps I have taken will be enough. I pray they are, but no one knows what God has in store, so I give him control, and can only pray that I don’t get in the way!

Impromtdude @ Facebook.com/impromtdude

I have covered this topic in a few other post, but today I will go into further detail to show you guys, Why I started to write, why I like to write, and Why I haven’t stopped. There is nothing better than to write for you guys and I thank you for the on-going support even if you guys disagree, I know that you will never leave, as I am not leaving. Yesterday, I was having a bad day and was about to cancel my account and discontinue my journey to 642 post. But then I remembered why I love to write, and I want to share that with you guys.
There was a point in my life that I thought I had found the love of my life. It was in October of 2011. I was at a convention and I was about get my worship on, but as I walked up to the front, this girl came up to me (she went to the same church) and said “Hi.” I wasn’t here to make new friends, so I said hi and bye and walked away. I could tell that I hurt her feelings, but I didn’t care. Well to make the story short and sweet. I went up to her after the worship and introduced myself and that night we went on a date. It was nice, well until a little later. After we got to know each other personally and after I fell hard for her, she told me that we couldn’t be friends anymore. I was crushed, and entered into a great depression. A depression that caused for me to stair at a wall for hours. To get over this, I had to find something to do. I posted my first blog post on blogspot under “Livingexampleb23” and it was called “The problem with getting over it.” Which was me begging for answers on what I did wrong. This started a tidal wave. I was in love with posting my feelings instead of keeping them inside. I found writing was the answer to get over depression. Even though I was writing way before this blog was posted, I didn’t become passionate until “The problem with getting over it.”
Through the years, I have found that I love to write, and will never stop doing this hobby. There is something about being able to get all my ideas and feelings out of my head. I have a thousand ideas a day and without the ability to write, my creative mind would go unnoticed. Then again if I couldn’t express myself through my blog then I would never express myself, leaving all my hurt in my brain and my heart. I tried to do this once and trust me I become a brand new person. Someone that is truly negative and angry. No one has time for that.
Then there is always the question of why I still blog. If I got over the girl then why continue to council my mind with the words that I proceed to type onto Jotterpad. The reason is clear; I have more hurt in my life that I am not over, but also because I am passionate about what I do. I couldn’t imagine life without this keyboard and monitor, or the hours of planning, writing, and editing. If I gave up at this point I would have lost all of those hours that I could of used elsewhere. But I am glad that I haven’t giving up, because I was sure that I would have. But I didn’t and now I am happier than I have been in years.
“I’m still in love with what I do, with the idea of making things up, so hours when I write always feel like very blessed hours to me.”-Stephen Kings. This quote describes my heart when I write, I can write for hours and where most would think I am wasting time, I feel like I am making a change. Not in the world but something is changing inside of me, something that I am happy to accept and embrace, even if no one reads my blog, I know that the change I have accepted is worth it. It is worth keeping the blog open as long as I live.